Posted tagged ‘beer’

Understanding Tax Through Beer

01/11/2010

The hardest thing in the world to understand is income tax. Albert Einstein

 
If this guy didn’t understand tax system-what about me?  And what about you?
 
When pondering the question of mining super taxes and the structure of our tax system in general please refer to this explanation using the language of Beer !!
 
Suppose that every day, ten men go out for beer and the bill for all ten comes to $100.

If they paid their bill the way we pay our taxes, it would go something like this;
 
*The first four men (the poorest) would pay nothing.*
* The fifth would pay $1*
* The sixth would pay $3*
* The seventh would pay $7*
* The eighth would pay $12*
* The ninth would pay $18*
* The tenth man (the richest) would pay $59*
 
So, that’s what they decided to do.
 
The ten men drank in the bar every day and seemed quite happy with the arrangement, until one day, the owner threw them a curve ball.
 
“Since you are all such good customers,” he said, “I’m going to reduce the cost of your daily beer by $20”. Drinks for the ten men would now cost just $80.
 
The group still wanted to pay their bill the way we pay our taxes.
 
So the first four men were unaffected.
 
They would still drink for free. But what about the other six men – the paying customers?
 
How could they divide the $20 windfall so that everyone would get his fair share?
 
They realised that $20 divided by six is $3.33. But if they subtracted that from everybody’s share, then the fifth man and the sixth man would each end up being paid to drink his beer.
 
*So, the bar owner suggested that it would be fair to reduce each man’s bill by a higher percentage the poorer he was, to follow the principle of the tax system they had been using, and he proceeded to work out the amounts he suggested that each should now pay.*

 
*And so the fifth man, like the first four, now paid nothing (100% saving).*
 
* The sixth now paid $2 instead of $3 (33% saving).*
 
* The seventh now paid $5 instead of $7 (28% saving).*

 
* The eighth now paid $9 instead of $12 (25% saving).*

 * The ninth now paid $14 instead of $18 (22% saving).*
 
* The tenth now paid $49 instead of $59 (16% saving).*
 
Each of the six was better off than before. And the first four continued to drink for free. But, once outside the bar, the men began to compare their savings.
 
“I only got a dollar out of the $20 saving,” declared the sixth man.
 
He pointed to the tenth man, “but he got $10!”
 
“Yeah, that’s right,” exclaimed the fifth man. “I only saved a dollar too. It’s unfair that he got ten times more benefit than me!”  “That’s true!” shouted the seventh man. “Why should he get $10 back, when I got only $2? The wealthy get all the breaks!”

“Wait a minute,” yelled the first four men in unison, “we didn’t get anything at all. This new tax system exploits the poor!”
 

The nine men surrounded the tenth and beat him up.
 
The next night the tenth man didn’t show up for drinks, so the nine sat down and had their beers without him. But when it came time to pay the bill, they discovered something important. They didn’t have enough money between all of them for even half of the bill!
 
And that, boys and girls, journalists and government ministers, is how our tax system works.
 
The people who already pay the highest taxes will naturally get the most benefit from a tax reduction… 

Tax them too much, attack them for being wealthy, and they just may not show up anymore.
 
In fact, they might start drinking overseas, where the atmosphere is somewhat friendlier.

David R. Kamerschen, Ph.D.
Professor of Economics University of Boston

 
* For those who understand, no explanation is needed.*
* For those who do not understand, no explanation is possible.*

2010 Language and Sayings

08/02/2010

* SWAMP-DONKEY

A deeply unattractive person.

* TESTICULATING.

Waving your arms around and talking bollocks.

* BLAMESTORMING.

Sitting round in a group, discussing why a deadline was missed or a project failed, and who was responsible.

* SEAGULL MANAGER.

A manager who flies in, makes a lot of noise, craps on everything, and then leaves.

* ASSMOSIS.

The process by which people seem to absorb success and advancement by sucking up to the boss rather than working hard.

* SALMON DAY.

The experience of spending an entire day swimming upstream only to get screwed and die.

* CUBE FARM.

An office filled with cubicles.

* PRAIRIE DOGGING.

When someone yells or drops something loudly in a cube farm, and people’s heads pop up over the walls to see what’s going on.

* SITCOMs.

Single Income, Two Children, Oppressive Mortgage.

* SINBAD.

Single working girls – Single income, no boyfriend and desperate.

* AEROPLANE BLONDE.

One who has bleached/dyed her hair but still has a ‘black box’.

* PERCUSSIVE MAINTENANCE.

The fine art of whacking the crap out of an electronic device to get it to work again.

* ADMINISPHERE.0020

The rarefied organisational layers beginning just above the rank and file. Decisions that fall from the ‘adminisphere’ are often profoundly inappropriate or irrelevant to the problems they were designed to solve. This is often affiliated with the dreaded ‘administrivia’ – needless paperwork and processes.

* GOING FOR A McSHIT.

Entering a fast food restaurant with no intention of buying food, you’re just going to the loo.. If challenged by a pimply staff member, your declaration to them that you’ll buy their food afterwards is known as a ‘ McShit with Lies ‘.

* 404.

Someone who’s clueless. From the World Wide Web error message ‘404 Not Found’ meaning that the requested document could not be located.

* AUSSIE KISS.

Similar to a French Kiss, but given down under.

* GREYHOUND.

A very short skirt, only an inch from the hare.

* JOHNNY-NO-STARS.

The ‘no-stars’ comes from the badges displaying stars that staff at fast-food restaurants often wear to show their level of training.

* MILLENNIUM DOMES.

The contents of a Wonderbra, i.e. extremely impressive when viewed from the outside, but there’s actually nought in there worth seeing.

* MONKEY BATH ..

A bath so hot, that when lowering yourself in, you go: ‘Oo! Oo! Oo! Aa! Aa! Aa!’.

* MYSTERY BUS.

The bus that arrives at the pub on Friday night while you’re in the toilet after your 10th pint, and whisks away all the unattractive people so the pub is suddenly packed with stunners when you come back in.

* MYSTERY TAXI.

The taxi that arrives at your place on Saturday morning before you wake up, whisks away the stunner you slept with, and leaves a 110kilo in your bed instead.

* BEER COAT.

The invisible but warm coat worn when walking home after a pub crawl at 3:00am .

* BEER COMPASS.

The invisible device that ensures your safe arrival home after a pub crawl, even though you’re too drunk to remember where you live, how you got here, and where you’ve come from.

* BREAKING THE SEAL.

Your first pee in the pub, usually after 2 hours of drinking. After breaking the seal of your bladder, repeat visits to the toilet will be required every 10 or 15 minutes for the rest of the night.

* TART FUEL.

Bottled premixed spirits, regularly consumed by young women.

* PICASSO BUM.

A woman whose knickers are too small for her, so she looks like she’s got 4 buttocks.


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